KOOS
25 Julie 2018
We are save back home. I will share the adventures of our travels later.
I actually have to much to share, fallen behind with all the amazing moments in time divinely set up by God.
So, beginning of last year, through my amazing Herbalife team, I find myself intrigued by this event on FB.
What a holy experience it was! I still don’t fully understand the journey God started with me.
(Read more about it in this blog: https://www.daisysjournal.co.za/daisysjournal/grief-jryyp-h778p-cpsj7)
So far, I have only miss one if the quarterly meetings and I would really like to invite any Christian Business Women to plug in to Connect. Founded by Louise Knight.
Every meeting is Spot On aligned with God.
At one of these meetings a lovely lady, Magdalena L. was there. Not only was she the wife of one if the veterinarian’s that my husband worked with (That already was something big to experience.) But she is also an agent for Anna-Emm.
In our rush for Cape Town I asked her about a special, thought I missed it, but this morning she Whatsapp me, the books are here.
My son reads books to fast, so I have been supporting Anna-Emm through Magdalene very well. What perfect timing it was to get good news this morning.
Previous order I got KOOS magazine, but haven’t had time to read it yet.
Nothing to do with receiving Martin’s his books today, I just happened to sit down, saw the magazine at very odd place and started reading it.
LOVE IT!
I initially ordered it because of Timothy Kieswetter’s name on front page. I know of his famous homeschool wife, but only learned about him earlier this year through Tipsy Terte group and event he had in Jeffreysbay.
I have only read the 1st 3 articles of KOOS and WOW!
Soulfood straight from the heart. My kind of reading.
So 3rd article.......😢
My superman, Kobus from Jacobus, made a joke about himself and said, just call me KOOS, K, dubbel O, S.
Like 007….
So in his extra-ordinary, unique humble-ness, there was this private joke among us close circle friends who knew exactly how good Bolla (Kobus) was.
He will always be Nr 1. So maybe, subconsciously I ordered KOOS in memory of my amazing hubby.
Something I would have missed out on, if I weren’t Godly aligned, at the right place and the right time.
20 Julie 2019
Well, let me try.
So many things happened, so many thoughts that I should have shared.
My only comfort that God understands.
This 23rd month, 2d winter without our superhero, I am hitting rock bottom.
This morning, I really didn’t want to get up.
I feel dead, emotionless, empty. Brain damaged.
Tired of binge-ing on Netflix and food, scrolling Facebook to avoid thinking, I decided to finish reading Koos 4.
My 11 year old son asked me, did you find something of Dad in Koos yet?
I said no, and then, Wait, yes! I actually did!
So maybe I must write a letter to Koos again, to describe how “spot on” every single article feel like it is meant especially for me.
So much so, that I am moved to share some of my life and thoughts again.
Mostly so moved by God, for a reason He only will know why.
So if you haven’t got a copy of Koos 4 yet, I think you need to get it.
It is very inspiring and.....
I just finished reading Spook Bees.
The 1st of the short stories.
As oldest daughter of 5 children, married to dairy farm manager, with nick name of Kosie....(by his brother's-in-law)
On this depressing, and very cold day, I am in tears by this story. Missing my husband, missing my Dad & Mom, missing my siblings, overall missing and greatly mourning and grieving the horrible loss of how our lives used to be as family.
Moved to more tears, with my beautiful daughter, honoring me with so much respect, to send me photo’s and voice notes, with love from Russia.
I am taking this winter to be down, waiting for my daughter to return home safe, and then we will prepare for the 3rd year and Spring without Bolla.
We will fight! Starting on our knees with prayer first.🙏🏼
Moving through the stages of grief.
28 July 2022
For a very long while I searched for my husband in music, songs on the radio, in books, in the things he loved, a face in the crowd.
It is hard to explain the horrific shock of finality of death, and then to be side track by so many trauma and drama’s, that I couldn’t grief my beautiful husband in a normal way.
I had to stand strong for so long. In the beginning of this year, I lost it!
I just deliberately wanted to loose control, tired of trying to be good and still not be acceptable and good enough.
I also heard God say to me:
THE RISK YOU TAKE WILL BE WORTH IT.
Which is spot aligned with that Holy Meeting at very first Christian Business Women Connect in January 2017, when my husband was still alive.
SOMETIMES FAITH IS SPELLED RISK.
ALWAYS REMEMBER THE WHY.
WE LIVE BY FAITH AND NOT BY SIGHT.
I actually risk all now, and experience surreal peace that surpasses all understanding. As it is very tough times now for many people. We still have so much to be thankful for.
In 2 days it’s my Mom’s 3rd birthday in heaven.
Then we are in for one heck of a busy August.
A very difficult August ending in the 5th anniversary of my husband’s last day on earth.
I keep on thinking, if I just can get through this month, and then another year.
Things are tough now, and I am tired of living for something that will never be mine.
I just want to put everything behind me and start living for myself and full out again.
They say 5 is grace. Well, so far we had abundance of grace from God, and I pray that the next 5 years will also be full of God’s Grace.
Love,
Daisy
PS:
As always, excuse the mistakes. I have OCD, but I am not a perfectionist..
Still a work in progress. (Always & Forever)
Please contact me with any advice on how to improve. :) )
To find out more about Herbalife or our farm guestshouse, send me a message in CONTACT
