Hospital traumas
27 May 2019
Life is so hectic for us at the moment, it feels like I can’t keep up.
After reliving the trauma with my husband, while visiting Ruan for 6 weeks in hospital ICU, in PE, we gone through another traumatic ordeal with my daughter’s eye that needs an operation and some other stuff!
Saturday a week ago I finally got my dream come true to do the Parkrun, this Saturday I was too late and my kids and they’re friends showed me this amazing, absolute bonus, surprise beach nearby this blessed house we have in town.
I actually had a dream about the white sand and blue water, the night before. Said in my dream to my children, Daddy would have loved living here.
God is truly good.
I am still struggling how to juggle all as single parent. Cutting the grass of two houses, visiting all the family, whilst attending to kid’s school business and growing group, very blessed girl friends coming for coffee visits and had my 1st dinner date with stunning lady, who persisted to finally find a time to suit both our schedules! God sent angels over my pathway on earth!
Feeling a little bit guilty to have so much fun, inbetween trying my best with growing Herbalife businesses. Not my OCD perfection, but devinely blessed by God. But these ladies really put a smilie on my face and they are all spiritually stronger than me, uplifting me tremendously!
Thankful for my pastor lady encouraging me spiritually and emotionally A LOT too, telling me to have grace with myself. I tend to get very hard on myself.
We still have a dream life and are very happy, but it hurts A LOT still too.
Hard to explain, but I can be smiling the one moment, just to burst out in tears the next moment.
Soon 21 months without Bolla on earth.
We have accomplished a lot and a lot still need to be done.
I feel exhausted and drained. Clinging on to a prophetic word my pastor lady and church ladies got right after my husband’s death and waited till when God said the time is now right to share with me.
So when I feel like I can’t anymore, I remember that God remembers me and He alone gives me strength to carry on.
More and more I realize what an amazing Provider and Protector God is to us.
If we can just get through the 2nd winter and 2nd year without Bolla’s physical protection on earth. Sensing his presence sometimes still so strongly. Loving his soul more and more!
I pray sincerely, to live full out and superfast the 3rd year without my superman on earth!
Longing to look into the eyes of his soul in eternity again.
Mariskaburger4ever💚
KobusBurger4everyoung💙
This was one of the songs that played on my husband’s funeral.
My kids still can’t listen to it. Myself I battle to listen to it.
15 Julie 2020
OK, so basically, everything from the point where my husband passed away, got really difficult to push through any memories.
Eating out at Ocean Basket the first time without my husband, going into any Mall without my husband.
Seeing a doctor, ambulance and hospital is emotional torture for me.
Last year my daughter had an emergency root canal, she was in horrific pain for whole weekend, as our 20 year long dentist couldn’t make a plan to fit her in (why my kids always wait till Friday afternoon to decide it is time to tell me they need serious medical assistance!) and I have called Discovery, got approved dentist list and started calling local dentist, all fully booked months in advance.
No chance if you are new patient!!!
Crazy, ridiculous medical system we have!!
Last dentist I tried in St Francis said they could help us immediately. My goodness, did they do an AMAZING job with my daughter.
So with root canal, you have to go for 2nd appointment and I let my son go for routine check up there too.
What the dentist told me there about my son, needing a plate to move his jaw in the right bite, which will affect his breathing, his sinuses, his concentration, also my son’s headaches!! And many more. That got my so emotional, I wish my husband had that opportunity...😢
Thoroughly x-rays and photos and measurements done!
I was totally blown away with the service.
That was December.
Then my Mom passed away.
We battled with water at guestshouse midst of dealing with my Mom’s death and funeral over Christmas and New Year!
Got new farm manager in Feb.
Fully book guestshouse in March.
New homeschooling curriculum to adapt to with Impaq, and we JUST, JUST got a handle on life and then....
LOCK DOWN!!!
We all 3 had tooth ache, but we’re to terrified to go. My goodness, the story of lock down I will share another time.
Eventually my daughter really had to go again for emergency visit!! This time had to wait a day for appointment.
She has dental issues after a horse step on her face!
Thoroughly fixed up now. Yet, nothing will ever be the same after that horse accident.
Yesterday, on the worst day ever, rainy and cold, my son and I, braved to go to the dentist. Appointment made two weeks ago, they are fully booked in advance for two weeks currently.
Now, here is the difficult thing, the dentist practice is right next to the doctor’s practice where we went when I was pregnant with my son.
So it is really hard to go there every time.
AND, yesterday, exactly 8 years ago, we had incredible memory of a dance concert my daughter had in St Francis.
That day and night it stormed.
Because we just started homeschool in that year, and the teacher said, come hell or high water, your child must show up!! So the younger me, faced a full river confidently with a Toyota Rav4 then, literally facing high waters!
Amazing concerts of amazing teacher, Jenny Davis!
We never went back after that scary ordeal (sorry Jenny, both my kids would still love to be in your dance school now if it was possible) and our journey with rythmic gymnastics started then.
If we could have stayed in town, the opportunities for my children, would have been so much different!
So yesterday, I am proud of myself to have pushed through many things to show up at our dentist appointment.
TREMENDOUS respect for Dr Micheal Jones and his whole staff with all the pre-cautions done, LOTS of hard work and really dangerous job to do, now in current circumstances with Corona Virus pre-cautions.
I am in tears with emotions that we have the privilege to take care of our dental health, as it truly affects everything.
The year my husband died, my previous dentist warned me, I could possibly die, because of abscess I had from front upper incisor I lost as a child, replaced with old fashioned steel and porcelain false tooth.
My husband still hold my hand through that ordeal, and I got everything ready, in case I possibly die, and then my husband died from a flue..... and he also had a terrible tooth abscess that last month he lived, but he didn’t take time of to go to the dentist more regularly.
I actually had to “con” him into going to see a physiotherapist while taking me to the dentist.
When my husband died, Marie van der Vyver said to my daughter, who had to see her regularly for sport injuries, that she had never been so angry at anyone, like my husband, for not taking more time of work, for much needed medical attention.
This is a long story, again, and I know times are hard for many people, but don’t underestimate your body’s health.
Especially don’t underestimate your dental health.
So after my son, I went in for my appointment yesterday and my goodness....
Talk about a prayer being answered for me yesterday, with a dental appointment at an excellent, thorough dentist.
Yes, it all started with a prayer.....
I can actually carry on. My Dad was in the police, with medical aid.
Just for precaution, our kid’s teeth got filled with mercury and we got braces in Highschool.
I lost my upper incisor due to disobedience to my parents, on a Sunday afternoon when kids we’re suppose to sleep. Took my brother’s bicycle without brakes down hill straight head on in an Eskom pole.
I started getting learning problems right about then.
With a mouth full of poisonous mercury, you count your blessings after 20 years on Herbalife Nutrition shake meals, that requires less chewing to release less poison.
All the mercury and steel have been removed over past 10 years very expensively, every time a little bit went, I detox severely.
So, I am typing here, teeth, jaw, neck still sensitive, but this morning when I woke up, I knew, something is better and different.
I asked my pastor to pray for my ears to open about two years ago.
Well, you will not believe me, what affect proper dental health can have on your ears.
And you will not understand the hell of living a live, wrongly diagnosed with bipolar depression and OCD, because at this point, I firmly believe, the state of my dental health, affected everything!
Thankful for so many blessings and many 2nd chances.
Mariskaburger4ever💚
PS: I believe God can answer prayers immediately, without medical intervention, however, sometimes it takes a while and some intervention for prayers to be answered.
16 July 2022
First of all, let me please state my own disclaimer that I express my opinions based on my personal experiences here.
Please don’t make any assumptions based on my personal opinions due to my life experiences.
Please don’t sue me. I am just leaving a record of what happened through the course of my life!
On the 4th anniversary of my husband’s death, my path crossed with 2 people through devine intervention, that improved my health dramatically. That is a story for another day.
So far this year my daughter had to go for a wisdom teeth extraction. I lost it propperly! It was a horror experience.
Add to that, that we’ve been hectic busy with renovations on the farm guestshouse.
Looking back, I don’t know how we got through it.
8 days ago my son went for tonsillitis operation. The fear and stress was real.
I suffer PTSD in hospitals BIG TIME!
It’s horrible! I don’t know where I get the strength to push through the memories. So many memories!!
Yet, we had the most surreal, devine moment in time.
All the nurses we’re friendly, but the one nurse was just in awe with my son. She could not stop making a fuss about him, and as she discovered I am a widow, she shared she had a special place in her heart for widows, as her Mom is one too.
That beautiful nurse recognize my son in the spirit. For me as a Mother to witness that specific moment in time, right then. Priceless.
She said that she isn’t a prophetess, but…. And then she confirmed something about my son, I knew from before his birth, when I was about to take my life, while pregnant with him, because of severe depression I suffered then during the last term of his pregnancy.
As we waited for his operation, she brought him something special, a little lable with Bible chapter on, to stick somewhere to remember.. He put it on the back of his cellphone.
COINCIDENTALLY it is a very significiant Bible chapter that recently came over my pathway.
Psalm 91
I read it to him, just in time before he was taken away to be operated.
How relieved I was when everything went well. It took me a day or two to come to my senses again. By now, I have learned to surpress memories and not to overthink things to much.
Anyway, how cool that we are driving a Rav4 now again.
And then the dentist story, well that is something for another blog. It cause a direction to another series of interventions, wether devine or not, I still am not sure, BUT, Rom 8:28 I cling on to always.
The whole medical aid, doctors and hospitals is another blog entirely!!
I wish nobody to go through any such trauma.
But by the grace of God, somehow, some way, I and everyone else in need of the medical world, get supernatural strength to cope through emergency times.
Never easy at all!!
Love,
Daisy
PS:
As always, excuse the mistakes. I have OCD, but I am not a perfectionist..
Still a work in progress.
Please contact me with any advice on how to improve. :) )
To find out more about Herbalife or our farm guestshouse, send me a message in CONTACT
